How can i say Merry Christmas to my self  with this emotions...i feel soo sad..things for me  doesnt go right..had 4 years chirstmas time away from my family..i feel like im alone..im soo empty..but i guess this is just normal coz im just only a human..have emotions. senses.soul..and the physical body..

My thoughts and point of view about christmas is the time to renew our faith..its reminded us that god gave his only son for us to save..this is the day when christ was born..we have to celebrate..christmas its not just only for exchanging gifts,nice clothes,lots of lots of yummylicious foods..thats is just how the way we celabrate our day of salvation..but what is the real essence of chhristmas is the time for love ,the purity of our heart..

that just my thoughts but deep inside of me..im empty..i have lots of love in my heart... its over flowing ..but i am saying that i am empty because im longing for my family..im longing for the attention and stuff...i want to celebrate christmas happy as i could..falshing back past christmas...how i miss my mother...she used to gave christmas pesent for us(me ,nd my 2 sis) a 6 pcs panty...thats funny though but i found it sooo cute..i love you Mamang your the best...

Last christmas i had in the phillipines is with CMO manpower Specialist Medical towers makati,,it was soo great..thanks guys im a part of it. though i love the job i had .but i had to quit,because i think im not worthy enough in the position.placing people giving a job,is a great task i ever done.if i could given a chance to do it again ,i wouldnt hesitate, but i want it on my own pleasure..no pressure,no boss ,.Maam Corazon i owe you something..i hope i could able to see you and have some coffee..i still love you maam Corazon im soo sorry,i didnt give you a chance to talk to me for the last time,its my decision,and glad i made it right,,life doesnt goes soo well here but still i can survive from day by day..whew!

The last thing i want to do is just chillax and chatting with my friend n the christmas eve,,it would be nice if my special sopmeone would spare even just a lil time with me..but i guess im just dreaming..hes busy like a bee..oh well having a vacation for a lil bit of time..i do understang hes making his time worthy spending with family and friends and maybe.... maybe with... hmmnnnn..sound intriguingg huh...oh well the reality of life..everyman success there a woman behind..im sure...pretty much sure....he (>>>>>>>>>>)



                       MERRY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE..
                                             AND  A
                                                      HAPPY NEW YEAR.....

              

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr........i woke up at 4 :am,i dnt know why i always woke up early it seem like my eyes have  alarm clock..i never got bck to sleep..so now i ended soring eyes and freezing...too much cold nd makes my joints aching...oh my this is the sign of getting old..oh well i cant help it..thats the reality of life...i need something to do with my aching joint maybe it is an early sign of rheumatism ,its called arthritis..waht more if i reach double of my age?oh well thats a long journey ...

i have jackets on,socks as well but still im freezing...its a weird thing though this is dessert country when summer cames too much hot that can burn  thicker skin...but when its winter time its cold like on the fridge...im gonna try to get some sleep even just 1 hour ,i will cuddle with my bear baby..i need human blanket lol just kidding no need.....i just need my comforter ...hope this day will end just normal ordinary day..lord guide me  i love you..

No matter how tough you are as a person,there are certain times that u cant even understand yourself..yes that what i am fast few days..im soo down and sleepless a restless soul..i know theres a lot of things that bothering me,thats because i want things happen but it seems like its not the right time... all i need  a bunch of patient..i know god is watching me and knows what my heart desire.. he knows what i want even though i wont ask him..but its for me to take action..i cant wait to go home and have my freedom..i can do what i wanted to do..not like here..i have invisible bars..i wnt to do things that i love the most..spending quality time to my family..and one more thing..beautifying my house..thanks to my mother ..shes soo kind..imagine i have a house instantly..i dnt need to sweat more... all i need to do is to pay monthly and after how many years its all mine...thank you lord for all the blessing..i love you ...